


The Hardest Part of This

by Space_Childs_Mother_Goose



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst, Emotional Manipulation, Gaslighting, Gen, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Sad TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Songfic, Suicidal Thoughts, TommyInnit Misses Toby Smith | Tubbo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-16
Updated: 2020-12-16
Packaged: 2021-03-10 20:41:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 974
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28103358
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Space_Childs_Mother_Goose/pseuds/Space_Childs_Mother_Goose
Summary: "Tommy, you are here by exiled"or a Tommy exile songfic to Cancer by My Chemical Romance*This is all roleplay, please read tags before reading*
Relationships: None
Comments: 1
Kudos: 68





	The Hardest Part of This

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone! This is the first fanfic I have written in years so I hope you enjoy. All of this is based off the characters on Dream SMP not the actual people who play them. The song lyrics are from Cancer by My Chemical Romance. TW/Suicidal Thoughts/Actions and Gaslighting

_~Turn Away~_

“Tommy, you are here by exiled.” Tubbo said as he stared down at Tommy.

WAIT! This was never part of the plan. Tubbo was his best friend and they were going to fight side by side until the end. Right? Tubbo was never meant to betray him. He would never leave Tommy behind, even if it was best for L’Manberg. Tommy also thought he would always find the discs important too, but that is not the case apparently. THE DISCS. The physical representation of their friendship and Tubbo said they do not matter to him.

_~If you could get me a drink of water, ‘cause my lips are chapped and faded~_

Every singe day Tommy wakes up drowning. Mentally and physically. He keeps hoping that one day he will sink down so far that he will not be able to make it to the surface before he runs out of health. It’s not like he has a reason to try to swim these days anyway. Everything is so tiring and he is so lonely.

_~Call my Aunt Marie, Help her gather all my things and bury me in all my favorite colors~_

“Ghostbur, if something were to happen to me would you let Tubbo know I loved him.” Tommy says while he dangles his feet above the pit of lava in the Nether.

“Of course, Tommy, but why would anything bad happen to you. You’re here with me and Dream to protect you.” Ghostbur seemed so confused. He threw some blue to Tommy and Tommy politely accepted it.

“Just in case bro.” Just in case…

_~My sisters and my brothers, still I will not kiss you~_

“Techno, STOP LAUGHING AT ME!” Tommy yelled at his oldest brother when he came to visit him in exile.

“Why would I? I told you this would happen before I released the withers onto L’Manberg.” Techno said in between laughs. “I tried to warn you.” He was trying to protect you.

_~‘Cause the hardest part of this is leaving you~_

“I miss Tubbo so much, Dream. I miss L’manberg so much. Could I please just go see the Christmas tree for 5 minutes?” Tommy begged. The former vice-president: one of the only people Dream feared was now begging that same man for five minutes to visit his former home.

“You know if you go through that portal, I will have to kill you. Those were the terms of your exile.” Dream looked at the teenager. God the boy was not even an adult and he was already banned from his home and isolated from his friends. “How about I have Ghostbur bring you back a photo?”

“Okay…”

_~Now turn away, ‘cause I’m awful just to see ‘cause all my hairs abandoned all my body, oh my agony~_

Tommy knew he looked awful. He could see it in how Ranboo reacted when he came to visit. He could see it in his reflection in the water he was constantly staring into. His hair was overgrown, muddy, and greying. His clothes were torn, and he could not even remember when he lost his shoes.

The dark bags under his eyes were evidence that Tommy had not slept well a single night since exile began. On good nights, he was plagued by memories of Tubbo and his friends back in L’Manberg and he would wake up missing them. On bad nights, he had nightmares about the wars was spending his childhood fighting. He had nightmares of Dream destroying his old home, and there not being anything he could do to stop it. He would watch he father, brothers, and nephew die.

_~Know that I will never marry. Baby, I’m just soggy from the chemo~_

Tommy knows he is going insane. He does not need anyone else to tell him that. He has not seen Dream or Ghostbur in days. He has started talking to the logs in Logsteadshire. Prime Log was his only companion, so he built hot girl. However, just like everyone else, hot girl left him.

Tommy really knew he was going crazy the day he thought he saw Tubbo come through the portal. Tommy had been in exile for so long, why would Tubbo visit him now? Even Dream agreed that there was nobody there.

_~But counting down the days to go, it just ain’t living~_

“Its not your time to die.” Dream said as he pushed Tommy away from the ledge.

“It’s never my time to die.” Tommy sulked away from the ledge. God, he missed home so much. Tommy was never meant to be alone for this long. He always had either his brothers or Tubbo around and now he was alone. At least he had Dream. His worse enemy and now his best friend. Now Dream was the only one who cared what happened to Tommy. So, who cares if Dream destroyed all of his stuff? At least he visits.

_~And I just hope you know that if you say goodbye today, I’d ask you to be true~_

Tommy was back in the Nether for what he hopes will be the last time. It had all gotten to be too much. He had been alone for so long. Every time he was in the Nether, he would sit and watch mods jump into the lava to their deaths, and Tommy just longed to be as peaceful as them. All the blue in the world could not take Tommy’s sadness. He just hopes that he would be able to forget everything like how Wilbur had. He seems so peaceful; Tommy could be more like him if he just takes one step forward.

Tommy hears footsteps come up behind him. He turns around.

“It was never meant to be.” Tommy says as he leans backwards.

_~'Cause the hardest part of this is leaving you~_

“TOMMY!”


End file.
